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Thread: Thoughts To Ponder

  1. #11
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    They make bullet proof vests, why not bullet proof pants?

    Is there any difference between partly cloudy and partly sunny?

    How does one know when their bagpipes need tuning?

    Allstate Insurance has a disclaimer that reads: not available in all states. What?

    Is it really possible to change the direction of a bowling ball by waving your hands?

    There's senior citizens, so why aren't there junior citizens?

    They say laughter is the best medicine - so who came up with the phrase, "I died laughing"?

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    Smile Thoughts To Ponder

    1. Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey?

    2. Why do they say a football team is the 'world champion' when they don't play anybody outside the US?

    3. If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn?

    4. What are the handles for corn on the cob called?

    5. Why do British people never sound British when they sing?

    6. Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer?

    7. Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born?

    8. If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?

    9. Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?

    10. In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?

    11. If K.F.C Stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Why do they play sweet home Alabama on the comercials?

    12. What type of animal is Snuffaluffagus?

    13. Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?

    14. Does a 'Marks-A-Lot' marker, mark any more than a regular marker?

    15. If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?

    16. How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

    17. Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene?

    18. What do you call male ballerinas?

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    1. When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling?

    2. Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us?

    3. Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed?

    4. Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee?

    5. How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?

    6. Do butterflies remember life as a caterpillar?

    7. Does the postman deliver his own mail?

    8. Why are women and men's shoe sizes different?

    9. Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?

    10. Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are?

    11. If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from?

    12. Is it appropriate to say "good mourning" at a funeral?

    13. Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith?

    14. How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

    15. Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

  4. #14
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    Smile Life's Unanswered Questions

    Why do "cool" and "hot" mean the same thing?
    Why do people squint when they can't see? Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?
    Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?
    Why do we call them pepperoni if there is no pepper in it?
    How old does something have to be to become an antique?
    Why do they say "an alarm going off" if it's really going on?
    How come French fries are not considered a vegetable, they are just deep fried potatoes?
    Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?
    How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?
    Have ex-bankers become disinterested?
    Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?
    How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
    How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

  5. #15
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    Smile Things to Ponder

    1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

    2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

    3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

    4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

    5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

    6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

    7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

    8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

    9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

    10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

    11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

    12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

    13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

    14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

    15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

    16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

    17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

    18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

    19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

    20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

    21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

    22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

    23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

    24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

    25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

    26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

    27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

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